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Stephanie and Mike talk about whatever issues or questions you have. In this episode:
1) Lauren Canario joins us to talk about talking. How do you talk more? Why do some people have no problem talking to strangers and friends, while other people don’t like to talk ever? And in response, how do you remain silent if you love to talk?
She Talk Live
http://traffic.libsyn.com/ftl/FTL2011-02-13.mp3
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Porc Therapy is a pro-freedom relationship talk show that takes a unique look at the question of how we can attain the most individual liberty possible, starting with our personal lives and relationships with others. 
I disagree somewhat on encouragement to talk for the sake of talking. In my own relationship, we are also both very quite people in our nature, and similar to Lauren, I’ve also noticed that we’re happier when we’re talking more, but what really seems to matter is quality over quantity.
Recently we moved in together, and for several months while the quantity of our communication remained the same, the quality greatly decreased. Instead of having in depth philosophical conversations, our communication shifted to purely logistical. Whose going to do the shopping, where’s that furniture going, how are we going to fix our heater before winter, etc.
For quite a while we both thrashed around, wondering why we weren’t happy, unable to figure out what had changed. We were still communicating, but it was leaving us unfulfilled. Since then we’ve been concentrating on having interesting discussions, asking each other how we feel about different issues (similar to your suggestion of the question book). We’ve both started writing blogs to practice expressing ourselves and our viewpoints. We’ve also started commenting on other people’s blogs, like I’m doing right now, to remind ourselves that what we have to say is valuable.
What I think has helped most, we’ve started sending each other interesting articles during the day, that we then talk about at night while we cook dinner together.
A good example, is this one on communication filters that he sent to me earlier this week, which sums up the quality over quantity argument quite nicely:
http://www.npr.org/2011/02/22/133958245/shhhh-quiet-people-at-work
“Christenfield specializes in researching human communication. He is
exploring the idea of “volubility,” the opposite of quietness. But in
his studies, he has found two basic notions of why people remain
quiet, “which my research has attempted to untangle,” he says. “One is that their minds are less fertile, and fewer expressible thoughts
occur to them.”
The other idea, he says, “and the one most people intuitively embrace, is that their minds are at least as productive, but their threshold for saying things out loud is much higher. In this case, the average utterance of a Quiet Person should be of higher quality than that of a talkative one. They have had mediocre thoughts, but declined to share them.”
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