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Stephanie and Mike talk about whatever issues or questions you have. In this episode:
[Question] First I’d like to say how much I enjoy the show. Your banter is hilarious and your kindness and concern for questioners is very touching. Porc Therapy and libertarian philosophy in general have been very helpful tools for my self-improvement.
My question requires a little bit of back-story:
I’m a 24 year old male and am socially awkward. I now understand that I developed this as a defense to the verbal and -on a few occasions- physical abuse that I suffered in school. The Fat kid sitting by himself reading was attacked less than the Fat Kid desperately trying to fit in. However useful this armor was as a kid, it ill suits me now. Unfortunately, It has been on a long time and is proving difficult to peel off.
I have yet to have sex, and more importantly have yet to be in a serious romantic relationship. I have recently started dating, but this inexperience is making me very self-conscious. I fear honestly saying “I’m a virgin – no, not for religious reasons- and on top of that I’ve never had a girlfriend.” For example, I met this young lady today for coffee. We were hitting it off, she wasn’t even scared off by learning I’m an anarchist, but when sex came up in conversation and I experienced an involuntary fear reaction, paused awkwardly and changed the subject almost without thinking. She noticed my discomfort and our conversation got more awkward after that.
I’m guessing that this is a situation where I have to sack up, be honest, make mistakes, get my heart hurt a few times and I’ll eventually get the hang of it. But I wanted to ask if you have any advice for overcoming this first hurdle of that automatic fear reaction?
Peace, Love, and prosperity,
A Virgin Voluntaryist
http://schoolsuckspodcast.com
[Disclaimer: take us with a grain of salt!]
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Porc Therapy is a pro-freedom relationship talk show that takes a unique look at the question of how we can attain the most individual liberty possible, starting with our personal lives and relationships with others. 
I’ve got to disagree with one thing you guys mentioned. You were summing up his development in relation to the defense mechanisms. Having had many similar kinds of defense mechanism; just because you recognize one doesn’t mean you’re passed it.
It’s quite possible to still hold and use a defense mechanism even when you find it a drawback. He may still be scared to let it down but sees that it gets in the way of getting laid. To see something as a net loss doesn’t means you give it up. :(
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